Hmmm..okay: you’re convinced, but now something is gnawing at you. How do you know that you have enough qualities in you to lead compassionately? Don’t worry! In their book “ Compassionate Leadership. How to do difficult things in a human way ” (affiliate) Rasmus Hougaard (CEO and Founder) and Jacqueline Carter (International Partner and Director) of Potential Project tell us that we are compassionate by nature; it’s in our DNA. Recent studies show that when we show compassion, not only dopamine, but also oxytocin is released. These substances give us pleasant feelings and ensure cooperative behavior and a reduced fight-or-flight response to psychological stress.

But… we are not saints though: we also have our ego. Fortunately, our ego is our own survival instinct: we need this to protect ourselves and keep ourselves safe. So handy . It makes perfect sense that you feel some tension with the topic of compassion and leadership. After all, as a leader you have more power and influence, because you bear more responsibility. You make decisions that have a purpose that goes beyond individual interests. And yes, then you sometimes have to perform actions that are not good for employees and not good for you.

Also read:  6 psychological needs as the basis for good leadership

Human reactions and common behaviors

Because in those cases we have to do things that can cause tension in yourself or others, we often exhibit varying behavior that we can classify as follows. Do you recognize your own behavior in this?

  1. Caring Avoidance . We have an eye for people, but try to avoid the difficult human. You don’t want to hurt anyone and don’t do things that could hurt other people. This can mean that openness and transparency are at risk and people do not dare to open their mouths properly.
  2. Wise Compassion . This is where we function best: we balance our concern for people and the courage and candor to do difficult things.
  3. Ineffective Indifference . We are ineffective and behave indifferently. We act consciously or unconsciously heartlessly. This often happens when we are busy.
  4. Heartless execution . We have the courage to do difficult things, but act heartlessly: we turn off our feelings.

Results take precedence over people

The good news is that you can train yourself to work from wise compassion as much as possible. How? Just read these tips!

Treat people the way you want to be treated and put yourself in their position: be open to their feelings. Listen carefully. Give Payroll Directors Email Lists more than you take, and give people options and choices. Challenge people to develop.

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These concepts are often confused. Empathy means: taking over the emotions of the other and experiencing them yourself. This can make the other person feel less alone, it can provide the experience of connection. However, it can also cause emotional contagion and caring avoidance, if you want to spare the other person or yourself pain. With compassion you will act: you will help the other by taking action. Here you can use your leadership. To lead with compassion, you need a spark of empathy

To train your wise compassion, it is necessary that you take the time and space to experience your own emotions and consciously reflect on your own challenges. For example: if you have to do difficult things that affect you as a person. Explore what you need to recharge, relax and let go of work.

Doing difficult things takes courage. We naturally tend to avoid painful things and engage in 3 of the previous 4 behaviors. That is why it takes courage and perseverance to continue and train yourself to work from wise compassion. With courage it is like this: the more often you do difficult things, the better it gets. The thresholds are lower and you get more self-confidence and more peace. You grow as a leader and as a person.

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